


Purrfect

by krucxa



Series: do not remind me of this au [1]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Neighbors, And I'm sorry for that, Angst, Attempt at Humor, Cats, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Mutual Pining, Panic Attacks, Pining, Whoa, bc i can't control myself apparently, bc i'm poly and i had to make a poly character, because I can't, brb crying, can u believe that this fic is already finished, chan / woojin is onesided tho, jisung is poly in this fic, mmmmmm look another side ships!!, this fic was supposed to be only fluffy but there's also a bunch of angst there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-02
Updated: 2018-01-17
Packaged: 2019-02-27 08:32:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 17,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13244487
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/krucxa/pseuds/krucxa
Summary: Changbin was a simple person, really. He enjoyed both silence, and music. He liked his coffee as dark as his soul, which is, to be honest, not that dark when you think about it. He was scared shitless of talking to strangers, especially if the other person was clearly judging him. He also really loved cats.Even when they tried to bite his arm off.





	1. Chapter 1

Changbin was a simple person, really. He enjoyed both silence, and music. He liked his coffee as dark as his soul, which is, to be honest, not that dark when you think about it. He was scared shitless of talking to strangers, especially if the other person was clearly judging him. He also really loved cats.

Even when they tried to bite his arm off.

“Why are you attacking me, you little demon, I literally bought you a toy like two days ago!” he murmured a string of curses while trying to shake off the little black ball of fluff currently attached to his hand. Honestly, it didn’t really hurt, because the cat was just play fighting, but it still was pretty uncomfortable. He glared at the kitten, but his gaze quickly softened. Cats were so cute, and he loved cute things, even though he wouldn’t admit it out loud, he had a reputation to uphold after all. There were five of them in his dorm now. Five. Cats. And four of them were these little kittens that, apparently, loved to annoy him. That didn't stop him from adoring them though. He just couldn’t resist their deep, full of wonder eyes, nor their fur. Who doesn’t love the fluffy texture of a cat’s fur must be lying to themselves, was his honest opinion.

Not only was he single, he also had a bunch of cats. At this rate, as Jisung said, he’s gonna become some crazy cat lady. But honestly, he wouldn’t really mind that – cats were always easier to get along with than people, anyway.

Though when the kitty showed no sings of giving up, he just sighed, resigned. _Guess that I’ll just have to wait, then._

He really was too weak for them, wasn’t he?

After a few minutes consisting of him pouting, and a cat chewing on his (actually, strangely pale at the moment, was he getting sick?) skin, suddenly the doorbell went off. Caramel, which was the name of the kitten, startled and actually bit him this time before running away, but, hey, did I say _ouch_?

He was so ready to _fucking deck_ the person who caused his arm to sting this much, but then, oh boy, he wasn’t prepared for this.

Before him stood a tall (or maybe Changbin was just short?) boy, with fluffy, obviously died blonde hair, and a smile so bright that could rival the sun. But his eyes, Jesus, his eyes. They were such a dark brown, and they looked at him with excitement so big it was actually kinda concerning.

“Hey, you don’t know me, but I live next door and I heard some meowing. You have cats? Oh God, can I see them, please?” said the guy, quickly, too quick for his stunned brain to catch up, and wait, were those freckles? How could this make him even cuter? Wait, no, he’s waiting for a response isn't he, _fuck, get a grip!_

“Yeah,” finally stumbled out of his mouth, voice cracking and hands slightly trembling.

_Smooth._

Though the boy just smiled even wider, eye smile and dimples visible, and lord, Changbin’s heart was going to burst any minute now. That’s it. He’s gonna die because of this cute guy he barely knows. Will anyone even attend his funeral? Chan is an obvious yes, but he’s not sure about Jisung, that guy might just steal his cats and maybe some of his flannels. Damn it, Jisung planned it all, didn’t he?

“Great, I’m Felix by the way” was his reply before the boy literally ran off towards the gentle meows that were coming from the living room. Why was Changbin letting him do it, anyway?

_Well_ , he thought, still standing at the door, feeling his cheeks growing hot, _I’m so fucked._


	2. Chapter 2

“Hey, kitty, kitty,” how could such a deep voice sound so angelic? Changbin had no idea, but hey, he wasn’t gonna complain.

The cute blonde was now sitting on the floor in his living room, surrounded by four little fluff balls, while their mom simply watched from the couch. Felix’s eyes literally sparkled when one of the kittens let him lift it to his face. He bumped his nose with the cat’s, and, _jesus, okay_. That was way too cute, Changbin can’t handle this.

Realizing that he just spend the last few minutes just admiring the boy, he quickly walked towards the couch and sat next to the oldest cat. She glanced at him questioningly and purred happily when he pet her on the back a few times. You could say that she was a gift from his mother, when he was a teen and still lived with his parents. After he moved out, the cat followed him, and since he didn’t mind, it just stayed this way. The cat’s fur was long and snow white, her eyes such a dark brown they looked black. She was always there for him when he had panick attacks, her soft purring helping him to calm down. Her name was Bubbles, it was Jisung’s idea, which Changbin said he didn’t like, but, let’s be honest, he secretly adored it.

Besides Bubbles, Chan, Jisung and his family, there really wasn’t anyone he actually talked to. So, the situation he found himself in, wasn’t necessarily uncomfortable, but boy, wasn’t it awkward. He didn’t know what to say, so he just sat there in silence, but Felix didn’t seem to mind. His coos and giggles filled the space between them.

Changbin looked at the boy again – at this point he was lying down, the four kittens raging from white and gray to black, sitting on top of him. Caramel, the one that tried to bite him before (successfully, may I add) was now playing with Felix’s hair, seemingly interested in the blonde strange fur that belonged to this weird, really big cat who kept emitting squeaky sounds.

Changbin smiled unconsciously and pulled out his phone.

**Groupchat: 3racha in yo area**

**ilovedark:** guys  
**ilovedark:** guess what  
**ilovedark:** so this dude just barged in only to pet my cats?  
**juice:** is he cute tho  
**ilovedark:** th a t’s not the point  
**juice:** so he is!!  
**ilovedark:** sigh  
**callmecaptain:** and u just let him in?  
**ilovedark:** in my defence, he is kinda adorable,,  
**juice:** sdghksdjh i knEW IT  
**juice:** WHEN CAN I MEET HIM  
**juice:** I NEED TO APPROVE HIM OR U AIN’T GETTING ANY NEW BF  
**ilovedark:** i wasn’t going to what the h e l l  
**ilovedark:** _@callmecaptain_ please calm this kid  
**callmecaptain:** i’m not his mom though  
**ilovedark:** u literally screamed that he’s ur baby when some girl asked him out  
**callmecaptain:** well someone had to protect him from that  
**ilovedark:** couldn’t he just tell her he’s gay  
**callmecaptain:** but what if she cried!  
**juice:** you guys know that i’m in this chat too right  
**ilovedark:** anywaY, what should I do  
**juice:** u could make some hot chocolate  
**juice:** bc liek  
**juice:** who doesn’t like hot chocolate  
**juice:** u have bigger chances of wooing him with it that with your face  
**ilovedark:** e x c u s e y o u  
**juice:** I’m just saying the truth

At times like this, Changbin wonders why is he even friends with these idiots. And then he remembers that, right, they’re the only people that didn’t leave him after he told them about his anxiety. So, yeah, they might be okay sometimes. He glanced at Felix again; his full attention was still directed to the cats. Okay, he can do this, he won’t fuck up this time, he just has to stand up, ask him if he wants some cocoa, and then go to the kitchen. This should be easy.

And then he slams face first into the floor.

_You had one job, asshole._

“Are you okay?” he looked at Felix and smiled, even though it was probably obvious that it was fake. _Jesus, that hurt._

“Yeah, do you want some hot chocolate though?” that. Okay. No. Why did he have to say that right after he tripped. Now that didn’t even sound casual, like, at all. Great.

But Felix just grinned, like he always does, apparently. This wasn’t good for Changbin’s health. At least he wasn’t judging him.

“That’d be amazing, actually, thank you,” he replied, and that was all it took for Changbin to sprint to the kitchen.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the comments! ♡ I don't really know how to reply to them but I just wanted to say that I really appreciate you for these, they made me really happy  
> Also, I'm not really proud of this chapter, but honestly, when am I ever lmao  
> There's some light angst towards the end because I was feeling kinda shitty while writing it, so, sorry. Also, we're getting some actual story! That isn't about Changbin or Felix,, ayy

Okay, so, this situation wasn’t ideal. Not that great either. Maybe, just maybe, it was even _kinda bad_ , actually.

They were currently sitting in the kitchen, after Changbin made them some hot chocolate (he used milk to do it, of course, he wasn’t a monster). Felix was sitting in front of him, slowly sipping on his drink. He closed his eyes, making his eyelashes flutter, and hummed approvingly.

There was a long cross earring dangling from his left ear that Changbin noticed just now. It looked nice. _He_ looked nice – Changbin was weak.

“Do you like it?” he asked, just to start a conversation.

“Yeah it’s, wait, what was the word again,” he interrupted himself, muttering something under his breath a few times, and, _hey, was that English?_ “Good! It’s really good.”

Changbin sighed in relief, but he still felt pretty curious. Curiosity might have killed the cat, but, honestly, Changbin didn’t really care.

“You’re not Korean?” he blurted out without thinking, which he regretted instantly. God, that sounded dumb. Now Felix will definitely think that he’s an idiot.

“Actually, no, I’m an exchange student from Australia. Sorry if my Korean isn’t that good” while saying this, Felix straightened in his seat, embarrassment clear in his voice. Only now did Changbin notice a slight accent coating his words.

“It’s okay, I didn’t even notice at first. You’re amazing, learning a new language isn’t easy”

Felix visibly relaxed again, and that was it. They didn’t talk more that evening, besides Felix telling him that he had to go, and that he’s probably gonna visit. Changbin’s heart stammered at the thought.

It was getting late, but Changbin wasn’t going to sleep anyway. He’s always had trouble falling asleep, though lately it’s been even worse. At least he had something to do, and by that I mean practicing his rapping.

Before he could do that though, his phone lit up with a notification.

**Chat: Tired and Gay**

**jiSUN:** so  
**jiSUN:** did u woo him yet  
**bin:** no  
**jiSUN:** Boring™  
**jiSUN:** don’t u have any interesting news?  
**bin:** well  
**bin:** he’s from Australia  
**bin:** and he has a cute accent  
**bin:** barely noticable, but still there  
**bin:** alsO  
**bin:** his voice is so deep??  
**bin:** like  
**bin:** d a m n  
**bin:** I could listen to him talk for hours  
**jiSUN:** whoa  
**jiSUN:** dude  
**jiSUN:** bro  
**jiSUN:** my man  
**jiSUN:** you’re literally. so whipped  
**bin:** i’m? not?  
**jiSUN:** u sure sound like u are tho  
**bin:** shut u p  
**bin:** I met him t o d ay for christ’s sake  
**jiSUN:** and you’re already so weak for him  
**jiSUN:** don’t fall so easily  
**jiSUN:** it sucks  
**jiSUN:** it really does  
**jiSUN:** don’t be like me  
**jiSUN** : please  
**bin:** i know, jisung  
**jiSUN:** & now I’m sad  
**bin:** i know, jisung  
**jiSUN:** :c  
**bin:** do you want to cuddle? I could also bring some ice cream  
**jiSUN:** yes, please.

In the end, he didn’t practice his rapping, but he fell asleep cuddling with his best friend, so it’s okay.

≫≫

Waking up at Jisung’s place wasn’t even strange for him anymore. He’s done it so many times that he’s already familiar with it. He glanced lazily at the ceiling, not in the mood to get up just yet. He was comfortable here; legs tangled in the sheets, Jisung’s head lying on his chest, the boy’s hair tickling Changbin’s chin slitghtly.

“Binnie” the soft call of his name confirmed that his best friend was, also, already awake. He hummed in relpy, mind still hazy with sleep.

“Why do I have to fall for people so easily?” the younger boy whispered, not even trying to hide his sadness. It wouldn’t change anything, they knew each other way too long.

“It just means that you have a lot of love to give” he murmured back, trying to cheer Jisung up, at least a little bit. Jisung just smiled sadly in response.

“Why can’t these feelings be mutual, then?” Changbin knitted his eyebrows at that.

“Did either of them say something mean to you?” the sudden rise of irritation was clear in his voice.

“No, no! It’s just that… Minho doesn’t even know about my existence. No matter how hard I try for him to notice me, it just. Doesn’t work. And Jeongin… He’s so friendly with everyone, always has that bright smile on his face, and yet he always runs away from me. Am I that annoying? He can’t even stand being in the same room as me” his voice cracked at the last sentence, his watering eyes looking everywhere but at Changbin. But the older boy quickly brought him closer, hugging him tightly.

“You’re not annoying. You’re not a burden, either. You’re such an amazing, generous person that helped me through tough times, I can’t even find the right words that could fully describe how much I appreciate you,” he said calmly, even though seeing his friend like that hurt so, so much.

“And if anyone dares to say that you’re annoying, tell me, and I’ll come and kick them directly in the face. Repeatedly,” he added to lift the mood, before releasing Jisung from his ~~aggressive~~ supportive hug. The boy sniffed slightly, but smiled nevertheless.

“Wow, Friendship goals” he joked, his voice still trembling a little. At least he wasn’t crying – Changbin’ll take it. He called the younger an idiot, even thought the softness in his voice showed that he wasn’t serious.

“You want some breakfast or do you want to cuddle for a bit more?” he said after a few minutes of comfortable silence. He still didn’t feel like getting up, especially after Jisung’s breakdown, but if the boy asked him to, he’d sprint to the kitchen and make him something to eat.

“Can we stay here for some time?” it was said with such vulnerability that he couldn’t say no.

“Of course.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I listened to [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sSo5SUitVnM) on repeat while writing this chapter, and, let me tell you, it really helped hA

Since both of them had no motivation to Get up, Changbin called Chan to come and bless them with his beautiful self (by which I mean, come and make them breakfast).

“Get up, kids, food’s ready!” 

Not even five minutes later they were sitting at the table, staring at Chan, obviously hungry. The oldest chuckled and put down three plates, giving everyone two pancakes (if anyone noticed the additional one on Jisung’s plate, nobody said a thing). 

“So, Changbin, any news on your sudden guest?” said Chan after a few minutes of silence, caused by all of them focusing on the food. 

“Right, you’ve never told us his name!” chimed in Jisung. Changbin sighed tiredly, before finishing the pancake he was munching on before. 

“His name is Felix-” he didn’t get to finish his sentence, however, because Jisung suddenly started screeching. 

“Felix? Australian Felix? With a deep voice? Jesus, I know him, he’s in the same dance team as me!” he said, maybe just a little too loud, standing up and leaning towards Changbin excitedly. 

“You mean, Minho’s team?” he quickly checked if the mentioned name caused any harm but Jisung looked fine, so he continued “Does he dance well?” 

“He’s really good, actually, you should come with me sometime” 

“Sure” Changbin replied with a smile and then glanced at Chan. He was sitting quietly, looking at them like a proud dad. Changbin frowned at him, to which he responded with a soft chuckle. 

They talked some more, Chan wrote down some lyrics that he would think of at random times, Changbin and Jisung commenting on them when he let them see some of it. Changbin also found Gyu, his beloved munchlax, lying on Jisung’s fridge, which was pretty weird, honestly, because none of them had any idea how would it get there. In the end, when the older two had to leave, Chan suggested that he could give him a ride. 

They were currently in Chan’s car. It wasn’t too fancy, but it was enough. Changbin like it – he was here so often that it gave him comfort when he needed it. 

“Hey, Chan?” said Changbin. Chan hummed for him to go on. 

“Do you get along with Minho?” the question was supposed to sound casual, but the slight tremble of his voice made it obvious that it wasn’t. Chan glanced at him from the corner of his eye. 

“Yeah, I do. Is this, perhaps, about Jisung?” he replied slowly, focusing on the road in front of him. Changbin nodded slightly. He knew he could tell Chan about it, the friendship of these three boys was build on trust, after all. 

“He… thinks that Minho doesn’t even notice him. Is that right? Did Minho talk about him with you?” 

Chan seemed to think for a few seconds. 

“Minho did tell me that Jisung is a good dancer. He didn’t have any remarks about his style, so he didn’t comment on it” he said truthfully, and _oh_ , that explained some things. 

“Could you tell that Jisung?” Changbin murmured and Chan relpied with a nod, a small smile on his lips. 

It didn’t take long to arrive to Changbin’s dorms after that. He thanked Chan for the ride and quickly got inside, because God, he was really underdressed fot this weather, his thin hoodie clearly not enough. He sighed, pleased, when he felt the warm temperature inside the building. _Cold weather? Don’t know her._

Before he could get into his dorm though, he heard a door being opened, and automatically turned into the direction of the sound. 

“Oh, hey, didn’t expect to see you here” said Felix with a grin. 

“I live here, though?” 

Felix’s smile didn’t falter. 

“Doesn’t matter. Actually, wait, I never got your name?” 

Changbin gasped. Right. He hasn’t introduced himself yet. _Fuck._

“Changbin. Seo Changbin” he murmured quickly. 

“Great, have a nice day, Bin” Felix replied, before going to the elevator. Changbin watched as his back disappeared behing it's doors, and slowly breathed in, then out. This didn’t go that bad. It could’ve been way worse. His mind could go blank and blurt out something stupid, like “your future husband” or something. That would’ve been so embarrassing, Jesus. And wait a second, did Felix call him _Bin_? 

The only witnesses that saw the blush blooming on his cheeks were his cats.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a slight spoiler for Voltron in this chapter so if you haven't watched the 3rd season yet, sorry?

Two days went by without anything out of ordinary happening. Caramel still tried to bite any visible skin of Changbin’s and Gyu was back in his bed. The munchlax still haven’t mysteriously disappear. Changbin was slowly getting suspicious.

On the second day Changbin tried to make some brownies. The result wasn’t exactly bad, but it wasn’t good either. He decided he could try some more, but maybe later. 

Today Changbin and Jisung were supposed to bing watch the 3rd season of Voltron together. Jisung was currently ordering some pizza, while Changbin was trying to build a blanket fort. And, don’t look at him like that, blanket forts are perfectly acceptable at his age (honestly, at any age, if you’re desperate enough). They’re also really cozy so you have literally no right to judge him. 

He just put the fifth cushion on it’s place when someone knocked on his door. He went to open it, confused. He wasn’t expecting anyone else. Before him stood a smiley Felix, and he felt a light sense of déjà vu. He quirked his brow in a silent question. 

“Can I come in? I’d really love to pet some cats right now, to be quite honest” the blonde said, scratching nervously at his neck. 

“Yeah, why not, me and my best friend are watching Voltron, though,” he was sure that Jisung wouldn’t mind. And they already knew each outer, so it shouldn’t be awkward. Felix made sure that he wasn’t intruding, and by that I mean, Changbin had to tell him four times that he wasn’t, only then did he come in. He didn’t comment on the fact that both Changbin and Jisung were wearing pyjamas. 

When Jisung noticed who came in, he quickly sent him a bright grin, and Felix’s face shifted in recognition. 

“Jisung?” he asked, even though he already knew it was him. 

“Yep,” replied the older anyway. 

They talked excitedly about dancing and cats until Changbin told them that everything was ready. Jusing literally threw himself at Changbin, who was sitting inside the blanket fort, and lay his head on his best friend’s lap. Felix looked at them with a weird expression, Changbin couldn’t tell what exactly it was, so he glanced at him with clear confusion in his eyes. 

“You’re, like, together?” asked Felix, and, okay, _what_. Before his brain could catch up with what the blonde was implying, Jisung snickered, curling with laughter. 

“God, no! We’re just best friends, that’s it. I’m not even his type anyway,” said the boy, even though he looked like he had trouble breathing for a second there, and then he added with a smirk “You’re way closer to being his type, honestly” 

Changbin hit the back of his head, feeling his cheeks burn, and quickly looked at Felix. The weird look was gone, and he was back to smiling. He walked closer to them, before sitting beside Changbin and wiggling his eyebrows at him. Changbin replied with an angry huff. Then the show started. 

They didn’t talk much. A few minutes into it, Caramel came and sat in Felix’s lap, who grinned and started petting the kitten. In Changbin’s eyes, he looked as cute as the cat – and he always thought that cats are way cuter than people. 

“I can’t believe this, Matt can’t be dead!” Jisung whined when the scene of Pidge crying was showed, and sniffed a few times. Changbin shushed him, but pet his head anyway, just like what Felix was doing to the kitten. Then the pizza finally came and Changbin had to push Jisung out of the blanket fort because he didn’t want to get up. When Changbin was back with the pizza in his hands, they stopped the show so they all could get an even number of pizza slices. Jisung whined again when it turned out that Changbin had no ketchup left, to which he swiftly told him to shut up (then Jisung started pouting at Felix, and since the boy was weaker than Changbin, he went to his dorm to bring some ketchup). 

They were at the last episode when Felix fell asleep, and his head landed on Changbin’s shoulder. No, he wasn’t blushing, and _don’t you look so smug, Jisung._

Jisung only smiled wilder at Changbin’s glare, and took the kitten that was currently sleeping in Felix’s lap to bring it to it’s mother. 

Changbin glanced at Felix and his heart skipped a beat. He looked so peaceful, and in such proximity he could count every freckle adorning his face. _Whoa there, feelings, that was unacceptable, abort mission, **abort mission.**_

And when Jisung came back, he didn’t comment on the arm that was slung around Felix’s back. He announced Nap Time and lay back in Chanbin’s lap. It didn’t take too long for both of them to fall asleep.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> two chapters in one day, i'm on a roll lmao  
> but don't expect anything tomorrow bc idk if i'm gonna have time to write anything ehh

**Chat: don’t talk to me Or my son ever again**

**flannel boi:** _[attached image]_  
**flannel boi:** they have no right to look this cute so early in the morning what the h e c k  
**koala:** they grow up so fast  
**flannel boi:** how much do u wanna bet they;re gonna get together in liek  
**flannel boi:** 3 months  
**koala:** well  
**koala:** if they don’t, you’re cleaning our practice room for two weeks  
**flannel boi:** //sigh  
**flannel boi:** oookay  
**flannel boi:** but if they do, ur buying me coffee for an entire month  
**koala:** deal

Changbin woke up to a snicker. His body felt heavy, like something was lying on top of him. He groaned, before slowly opening his eyes and looking into the direction of the sound. There stood Jisung, with his phone directed at him, a pleased smile on his lips. He wiggled his eyebrows, and, okay. That was suspicious. Changbin tried to lift his arm to rub at his tired eyes, but he just. Couldn’t. So he was right, something was indeed lying on top of him. He glanced at it, and, oh. Not a something, but a some _one_. Felix was cuddling him in his sleep. 

That whole sentence didn’t make sense. Changbin would quickly push him away, because, hey, Jisung’s making fun of him, but he really didn’t want to wake up the boy. And, to be quite honest, it wasn’t actually that bad. Maybe, it was even kind of enjoyable. The boy’s head was tucked under Changbin’s chin, his left hand gripping the older’s arm. He was so close, Changbin could smell his shampoo. It was a sweet smell, but not like, bubble gum sweet, like Jisung, but more of a fruity scent. It wasn’t too strong, just enough so that you could tell it was there. 

“Hey, loser, stop being all lovey-dovey and go eat the breakfast that I made for you, you ungrateful twat” Jisung’s voice was what pulled him out of his thoughts. He cursed under his breath and flipped him off using the one hand that Felix wasn’t currently crushing. Jisung chuckled and left the room. 

Changbin booped the blonde on the nose. Felix scrunched his face, before shying away. 

“Five more minutes” he murmured, and Changbin was slightly taken aback, because, how could his voice sound even deeper than it already was? 

“Get up, Jisung made us breakfast” Changbin replied, and the oother boy’s eyes opened instantly, boring into him. 

“I’ve never thought that I’d like to be someone’s sleeping beauty and yet here I am” he hummed, his voice strangely serious. Changbin decided to ignore the whistle from the kitchen. 

“What?” 

But he didn’t get any reply, since Felix was already up and heading towards the kitchen. Changbin just shrugged it off, because _what could that even mean_? 

Turns out, Jisung made eggs with bacon. The bacon was slightly burned, but it’s the thought that counts, so Changbin didn’t comment on it. Instead, he just smiled and thanked the boy, whose eyes sparkled at his words. 

That’s when Bubbles came, bringing her kittens with her, and stealing Felix’s entire attention. Changbin sipped on the coffee he just made for himself, when his phone vibrated. It was a notification from snapchat. Jisung send him a photo of Changbin and his coffe, with a ‘don’t look so bitter’ attached to it. He didn’t even realize how tightly he was gripping the mug. He shoot Jisung a glare, to which he snickered, which in turn made Felix look up at them, confused. 

Suddenly Changbin remembered the fact that Felix was from the same dance team as Jisung. It wouldn’t hurt to go with them there, would it? 

“Hey, Jisung, don’t u have a dance practice today?” he asked, and the younger boy yelped. 

“Jesus, yes, I forgot about it!” he looked frantically at his pyjamas, then at Felix and Changbin. It was clear that he was close to panicking, and fuck, that wasn’t what Changbin wanted. 

“It’s okay, I can borrow you some clothes, and then we can go there together? I’d like to see what it looks like” 

That seemed to calm Jisung down, and he nodded quickly, before running towards Changbin’s room. He’s probably gonna take one of his flannel’s, that’s gonna mysteriously disappear for a few weeks before it’s back in it’s place after Jisung visited him, but he didn’t really mind. He was used to this, and it’s not like he didn’t steal Jisung’s clothes sometimes. Okay, maybe a little bit more than sometimes. He actually did it pretty frequently, but hey, they were really comfortable, and they were just a little too big for him, which was perfect. Changbin took Jisungs clothes more times than Chan’s because, let’s be honest, Chan’s sweaters made him look like a little girl that was wearing her mom’s dress. 

“You’re really close” commented Felix after a few seconds of silence, his hand petting one of the cats unconsciously. 

“Yeah, I mean, he can be a pain in the ass at times” Changbin hummed, before finishing his coffee. Then he added “But I’m actually really grateful for him, and what he did for me.” 

“I’m glad you have such great friends” 

Changbin glanced at him, confused. 

“What do you mean?” 

“You know, it was kind of hard to get to know people at first when I moved here. Since, you know, language barrier and all that. But then I joined the dance team and it’s not as bad anymore, I guess? They’re all pretty nice” explained the blonde. He then looked at Changbin, his face unreadable again. 

“I was kind of scared that you’re gonna kick me out when I came here for the first time,” he continued, and then his lips slowly pulled into a soft smile. 

“I’m so happy that you didn’t. Thank you.” 

His words were so sincere, Changbin almost choked. If he had to describe Felix right now, he’d just say soft. That’s all that came to his mind at the moment. He put the mug down on the table and turned to the blonde. 

“You’re welcome.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'd say i'm sorry but am i really

When Jisung came back, Changbin and Felix whistled in unison. Changbin had honestly no idea where did he find that one black and red flannel he was wearing, because he haven’t seen it in, was it three months already? He also snatched some black skinny jeans, and he looked. Really good, honestly. Changbin quickly took a photo and texted Chan.

**Chat: Old but Gold**

**saltyaf:** _[attached image]_  
**saltyaf:** calm ur kid  
**saltyaf:** guys will swoon over him  
**bittersweet:** never would’ve thought that my son would turn out to be such a playboy  
**saltyaf:** btw we’re going on your dance practice, u gonna be there?  
**bittersweet:** someone has to take care of the kids  
**saltyaf:** i’ll take that as a yes

After that Changbin excused himself to quickly throw on some socially acceptable clothes, and then they were on their way. While they were walking, Changbin and Felix got so absorbed into their conversation, that Jisung had to kick them both for them to notice that the green light they were waiting for was already on. Felix chuckled nervously and Changbin proceed to hit Jisung in the arm a few times while they were crossing the street. 

The walk to the building from Changbin’s dorms was, apparently, only ten minutes long, so it didn’t take them long to get there. Before they went in, though, they stopped at the vending machine, because Changbin never says no to food. 

“Oh, hey, Jeongin!” suddenly exclaimed Felix, waving his hand wildly. The oldest glanced at the boy that just appeared. He had a bright smile on his face, that faded quickly when he saw Jisung. Wordlessly, he turned around and ran away, the back of his neck looking kind of red. 

Felix stood there confused for a few seconds, his right arm still in the air, before he slowly looked at Jisung, who had his head hung low, his hands tightly gripping his flannel shirt. Changbin shared a look with Felix and walked towards the trembling boy, wrapping him in a side hug comfortingly. 

They didn’t spend any more time outside, deciding that the dance practice might be a good enough distraction. 

When they walked in, there already were some people present. Minho was practicing his routine, while Chan was talking with someone that Chanbin didn’t recognize. He did see the blush on Minho’s cheeks when he looked in their direction, though. 

“Minho, how’s it going?” greeted Felix, giving said boy a high five. 

“Pretty good, even though I slept in today. And who is this?” he replied, nodding towards Changbin. 

“This is Changbin, Jisung’s best friend, you know, the guy I told you about?” 

Changbin’s eyebrows rised in surprise. _Felix talked about him?_

“Ah, okay, I remember. I’m Minho, by the way” the last part was directed to Changbin, and he extended his hand, which the other boy slowly shook. 

“I know, I’ve heard a lot about you” was his response. Minho looked taken aback. 

“You did?” his voice sounded a little higher than usual, and he glanced at Jisung subtly. _Interesting._

But then two other guys came in, ant the practice started. Changbin sat in the corner, watching them closely. Later he found out that the one that Chan was talking to was Seungmin, and the other two Hyunjin and Woojin, who seemed rather close. But the longer he watched them dance, the more Jisung was screwing up, which didn’t make any sense, because, hey, wasn’t Jisung a good dancer? Weird. 

It seemed that the only other people that found this suspicious were Chan and Minho, the latter kept throwing the boy worried glances. It was in the middle of the practice, when something finally happened. Hyunjin, Woojin and Seungimn were currently taking a break, so Changbin took the opportunity to try and get to know them, when there suddenly was a loud thud, and then a yelp, that must have belonged to Jisung. Changbin looked in his direction, low key panicking. The boy was lying on the floor, clutching his knee to his chest, his face screwed in pain. Changbin’s instinct told him to check it he was alright. But Minho beat him to it. He crouched in front of the younger boy and checked what was wrong. Jisung’s knee was bleeding, and the boy hissed in pain when Minho’s fingers touched his leg. 

“I’ll take care of him” he said, his voice calm even though his voice sreamed worry, before picking Jisung up bridal stile and going out of the room. 

Changbin couldn’t believe this. What just happened? Why did Jisung suddenly make so many mistakes? That just didn’t add up. He hoped that Jisung was okay. What if this was something serious? 

He felt tears prickle at his eyes, and he quickly rubbed at them to make them disappear. Chan pet his shoulder a few times, to let him know that he was there. Then Changbin felt a soft hand sneak into his own. He glanced at it, and looked up into Felix’s eyes, that were filled with worry. He hoped this was going to turn out okay. 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is kinda shorter than the last one but ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯  
> also 1st i say that i might not have time to write, then i post two chapters in a row, mm  
> don't trust me guys fkghf
> 
> **!! there's mention of self harm in this chapter !!**

**Chat: Tired and Gay**

**binnie:** so  
**jiSUN:** yeah  
**binnie:** what happened? you know what I mean  
**binnie:** are you okay?  
**jiSUN:** i’m feeling kind of shitty, but that’s all  
**jiSUN:** it wasn’t anything bad, actually  
**jiSUN:** like, yeah, it hurt a lot  
**jiSUN:** but it wasn’t anything really serious  
**jiSUN:** so I’m okay  
**binnie:** i was worried  
**jiSUN:** i know  
**jiSUN:** i’m sorry  
**binnie:** why did this happen anyway?  
**binnie:** what were you doing?  
**jiSUN:** i  
**jiSUN:** could you just come here  
**jiSUN:** i don’t really wanna talk about it through text  
**jiSUN:** idk  
**jiSUN:** it’s stupid  
**binnie:** it’s really not  
**binnie:** I’ll be there in 15  
**jiSUN:** but it’s a 20 minute walk from your home though?  
**binnie:** not if i run

≫≫

“What was that about?” asked Changbin when he finally got there. They were lying on Jisung’s bed, the boy’s left knee bandaged. 

“You know, how Chan said that Minho didn’t say anything because he didn’t have any comments about my dancing?” he gulped, then continued “I… I just wanted him to talk to me. That’s all. So I though, hey, maybe if I made some mistakes then he’d tell me what I did wrong? But he still didn’t, and I. I got carried away. I was so desperate for him to notice me that I hurt myself in the process,” he chuckled sadly, as his fingers danced on the bandage. 

Changbin sighed, and crawled closer to the other boy, before hugging him tightly. 

“I think I kinda felt that this would be the reason. But really, you shouldn’t do something so careless. We were really worried about you,” he murmured and Jisung nodded in reply. 

“I know. I was just…”

“Desperate?” chimed in the older boy, with the word that the other used before. 

“Yeah” 

“Okay, just… Don’t do that again.” 

Jisung just hugged him tighter, his legs tangling with Changbin's, careful not to hurt his left knee any more.

“You know what, Binnie?” 

Changbin hummed for him to go on. 

“When Minho took me to the other room, I’ve never seen him so shocked before. He was so confused why this happened, so I told him that I just wanted him to talk to me, leaving out the part about me being completely in love with him, of course. He called me an idiot” the boy giggled, before adding “He was really gentle. He also told me to take care of myself. Oh, he even gave me his number!” the last sentence was said with so much excitement that the traces of sadness on his face faded away. Then he showed his phone into Changbin’s face. The older took it reluctantly, and looked at Jisung questioningly, who replied with an eye roll that obviously meant _just read it, asshole_.

**Chat: ♡**

**squirell:** is this Minho?  
**dancingqueen:** Yes  
**dancingqueen:** Are you Jisung?  
**squirell:** yup  
**dancingqueen:** Nice  
**dancingqueen:** But I’m still mad at you.  
**squirell:** :c  
**dancingqueen:** You could’ve hurt yourself  
**dancingqueen:** Even more  
**dancingqueen:** I don’t want to see you hurt  
**squirell:** well, i’m okay now  
**squirell:** so it’s all good  
**squirell:** right?  
**dancingqueen:** Jisung.  
**squirell:** okay  
**squirell:** i won’t do it again, if that’s what you’re implying  
**dancingqueen:** Good

“He cares! He really was worried about me,” said Jisung, and Changbin looked at him seriously. 

“I hope there won’t be any other reason for him to worry about you,” he murmured. Jisung visibly stiffened. 

“Binnie, you know that I don’t do it anymore. I haven’t cut myself in two years, I’m not gonna suddenly do it again.” 

Changbin gripped his arm even tighter than he did before. 

“I hope so.” 

≫≫

**Chat: ?**

**unknown:** i talked with jeongin  
**unknown:** you know, about jisung  
**bin:** ?? who are u tho  
**bin:** and how did u get my number  
**unknown:** i’m felix, you idiot  
**unknown:** and i asked jisung

**change** _unknown_ **to** _freckle boy_ **?**

no **> > yes**

**bin:** so  
**bin:** what did he say?


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have no life so here u have a third (3rd) update today sglkglsd  
> btw can u tell that i was sorry for all the angst so i wrote some fluff bc ye

“You mean like, he’s just shy?” asked Chan. After Felix decided it would be a better idea to talk about it in person, Changbin quickly shoot Chan a text telling him to come to Felix’s dorm, where the three boys were currently sitting on the old, squeaky couch in his living room. Chan was necessary in this situation, as Changbin said, because not only was he the oldest, so he might know what to do, he was also one of the closest to Jisung people, besides Changbin.

“Kind of? He said that it wasn’t because he didn’t necessarily, like, hate Jisung, but he was scared that he’d do something stupid and he’d stop talking to him. Even though, by doing that, he isn’t talking with him anyway, so I don’t see his point,” explained Felix, and scrunched his face, before continuing “But he said that he could try not to run next time, after I told him what happened to Jisung.” 

Chan hummed, absorbing the information, his face stuck on the _I’m thinking of a solution_ look. Changbin tapped his thigh two times and looked at the floor wordlessly. He wanted to help his best friend so bad, but he had no idea how to do it. 

“I might know what we could do,” murmured the oldest, and the other two boys glanced at him curiously. 

“You know how I told Jisung to stay at home for the next few days? I said that he can’t go out, but not that we can’t visit him. We could all go see him, watch a movie or something, and by all I mean the dance team, too. Not only would there be Jeongin then, but Minho as well. Maybe then they could just finally talk.” 

“I’m not saying that Jisung’s gonna explode because of his two crushes being in the same place, but I really am,” replied Changbin, his lips slowly pulling into a smirk “I’m in.” 

“Me too,” added Felix, and that was all they needed to contact all of the dance team. 

≫≫

“What the entire fuck, dude,” was the first thing out of Jisung’s mouth when he opened the door to his house. Since none of them had any plans, they all met up in front of the building where they had dance practices. Minho and Seungmin bought some snacks on their way there, while Woojin brought two blankets in his bag, so they were all ready to crash at Jisung’s place. 

“Language,” Chan muttered with a frown. 

“English,” replied Jisung with a straight face, while the rest burst in laughter. Chan’s eyebrows knitted in slight irritation. 

“Don’t be so disrespectful in front of the kid,” with that, he pointed at Jeongin that was standing a few feet behind him. Jisung’s mouth dropped, and Changbin had to poke him for him to get a grip. The injured boy stepped back and opened the door wilder for all of them to come in. It didn’t take long for them to prepare everything. Chan and Woojin disappeared in the kitchen, Seungmin quickly following them with his and Minho's snacks, but not before Woojin gave Hyunjin the blankets. Changbin and Felix stood in the corner, wondering what was gonna happen, since now Jisung, Minho and Jeongin were basically alone. Jeongin looked like a deer in headlights and his cheeks were slowly getting redder, while Minho was looking at him suspiciously. Jisung seemed not to notice any of this happening, just staring at the ceiling nervously. 

“So,” he murmured, “we haven’t talked in a while, have we?” 

“Yeah, sorry,” mumbled the youngest boy, fumbling with his long sleeved shirt. His eyes danced around the room, not even once looking at Jisung. 

“It’s okay, I’m just glad you’re here now,” was what caused him to finally look at the boy, his lips slightly parted while his face became even redder, and how could that even be possible by now? 

Minho shot him another suspicious look, before the boy said that he had to help Hyunjin with choosing the movie and going out of the living room. Minho put his arm around Jisung unconsciously, which in turn made Jisung blush. Felix and Changbin exchanged a look. 

Then the others came from the kitchen and announced that everything was ready, so all the boys went to the living room and got comfortable, while Hyunjin started the movie. Turns out, it was a horror movie, so most of it was filled with terrified screeching from Jisung and Jeongin, while some others (Woojin) just flinched at every jumpscare. When it ended, Chan decided that they have to watch something else, to calm them down. So, a romance it is. 

“Changbin, look at Minho and Jisung!” whispered Felix excitedly. They were sitting next to each other on the floor and sharing a blanket, which was barely big enough for both of them. Changbin glanced at Felix questioningly. 

“Why?” he whispered back. 

“They’re cuddling!” 

Changbin quickly looked at the couch that was taken by the two boys, and oh, Felix was right. Minho was back hugging Jisung, with his face on the boy’s shoulder, who resembled a tomato. Changbin smiled, disappointed that he left his phone in his jacket, since now he couldn’t take a photo. But, apparently, Chan was ahead of him, his phone in his hand, a slight smirk on his lips, and they shared a look. A quirck of an eyebrow, a silent _you’ll have to send me this photo_ , and a nod, _of course I’ll do it_.

That’s when he felt an arm sneak around his waist, and he felt himself being dragged closer to Felix. He looked at him quickly, and, _Jesus_ , he was so close now their noses were almost touching. Changbin didn’t pull away though, rooted into his spot, while Felix just smiled brightly, his eye smile showing. _God, Chan’s so gonna make fun of him later because of this._

He tucked his head under Felix’s chin and turned back to watching the movie.


	10. Chapter 10

The peaceful atmosphere didn’t last long. Not that long after the movie ended, Changbin got Gyu thrown at his face. He hadn’t even had the time to think how the munchlax ended up here – before he could react, Felix was already throwing it back at the culprit, who turned out to be Jeongin. That’s when hell broke out. Everyone was throwing blankets and whatever was the closest to them at the others. Chan and Woojin teamed up against Seungmin, while Minho got Hyunjin in a headlock. Felix was aggressively hugging Changbin, who looked like he lost ability to breathe, and Jeongin started tickling Jisung, who couldn’t control his laughter.

“Stop, you little asshole!” he mumbled in between giggles, but Jeongin didn’t listen, just kept on tickling him, so he grabbed the boy by the head and brought him closer, smashing his face into his shoulder, which successfully made the younger stop. He tried to turn his head the other way, his nose lightly brushing Jisung’s neck and his warm breath tickling the other boy’s skin, making him realize in what position they were now. The older looked Jeonging in the eyes, both of them blushing, before they heard some whistles. Jisung glanced up, and saw Felix and Woojin staring at them like some predators, while Chan was in the middle of taking a photo. He glared at them, his face scrunched in a way that resembled an angry kitten, and that’s when Felix burst out laughing. 

The blonde was laughing so hard that both Changbin and Minho were starting to actually get worried for the boy’s health, until he finally stopped, rubbing at his watery eyes, the other hand clutching his stomach tightly. 

“I think I’m gonna get abs from laughing so much,” he said, before giggling a little more. His rosy cheeks in addition to his visible dimples made the most beautiful sight in Changbin’s eyes. 

Soon it started to get dark outside, and they decided to go their separate ways. Since Felix and Changbin were basically neighbours, they walked back together. They weren’t in a rush, so they took their time, talking about everything and nothing, and when they were by their dorms, the stars were already showing themselves on the sky. Before they parted, Felix pulled Changbin into a quick hug. 

“Bye,” he whispered with a smile. Changbin replied with a nod, and a soft smile of his own. 

≫≫

Changbin was trying to fall asleep, really. Sadly, trying doesn’t always equal to doing it successfully. He rolled over to lie on his left side and glanced at the clock, which read exactly 1:03 am. He huffed tiredly, and looked away, burrowing his face deeper into the pillow. Gyu was nowhere to be seen, as he disappeared again, even though he brought it back with him from Jisung’s place – and that didn’t help him fall asleep, like, at all.

He was so tired, his eyes closed on their own accord, and yet he still couldn’t lose consciousness. It would be getting at his nerves, but honestly, at this point he hadn’t even had the energy to be angry. 

He looked at the clock again. 3:46 am. Somehow a two and a half hours went by, but he was still awake. He groaned, before kicking off his blanker. If he wasn’t gonna fall asleep anyway, might just do something useful. He picked up a hoodie that was lying on the floor, and threw it on messily. In the mirror he saw a wild bedhead that he probably couldn’t get to look half decent even if he tried, and his eye bags looked like they had a second row of eye bags. He rubbed at them, but they didn’t disappear, so he quickly gave up. 

He went to the kitchen to find something to eat, but besides a few slices of cheese and a week old glass of water, it was empty. He sighed and decided to go to the grocery store at the other end of the street. Before he left though, he quickly put a beanie on to hide his bedhead, and put his walled in his pyjama pants pocket. 

The walk to the shop took only five minutes, and it was still open, which was honestly a blessing. He stood in front of bags of chips, when a familiar voice shouted his name. He turned around and saw Felix running up to him, his hair a mess, and a questionable stain on his shirt, yet his eyes were as lively as they always were. 

“You couldn’t sleep, too?” he asked, and Changbin shook his head. 

“Why don’t you come hang with me then?” 

Changbin shrugged, but said yes anyway. They walked around the store for a few minutes, until they decided to buy some instant ramen. Changbin was about to pull out his wallet, but Felix was quicker than him and insisted on paying for everything. In no time they were already heading back, shoulder to shoulder, while Felix’s hands played with Changbin’s fingers. He didn’t mind, and he figured that Felix would quickly get bored, so he didn’t do anything about it. Though the boy didn’t stop even once through the whole walk back. 

Felix’s dorm was cleaner than his. Not in a clean freak way, just, it wasn’t as messy as Changbin’s. There still was a lone shirt lying on the table and a can of coke that was yet to be thrown away. 

Turns out, Felix was also a better cook than him. Not that Changbin was terrible, but he wasn’t that great either, while the blonde managed to make instant ramen taste like a homemade soup with a lot of love put into it. He sighed, relishing in the taste. 

“It’s not that good, stop making that face,” Felix chuckled, his voice sounding a little hoarse. 

“It really is though,” he muttered back. 

It didn’t take them long to finish eating. When they did, Felix put their used bowls in the sink and took Changbin by the hand, intertwining their fingers and lightly pulling him towards the bedroom. Changbin looked at him confused. 

“I always sleep better with someone by my side, maybe it would help you too,” the boy explained, and Changbin let himself be pulled there. Felix lay down first, holding the blanket up for Changbin to get under it. He complied, and they moved around a little to get comfortable, until Changbin ended as the little spoon. Felix’s arms around him made him feel safe. 

“Good night,” murmured Felix, his voice already rough with sleepiness. 

“Night,” he whispered back. 

This time, sleep was quickly overtaking him. He felt a pair of lips gently kiss his temple, before he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote the second part of this while I couldn't sleep myself, so my irritation kinda flowed into my writing ha


	11. Chapter 11

Changbin was slowly waking up. He didn’t really want to, Since he hasn’t had such a good rest in ages, but he felt someone’s fingers gently touch his cheeks. He scrunched his face, before his eyes fluttered open, to see Felix’s face in front of him. His eyes had a soft shine to them as he was looking at Changbin with adoration, a soft smile on his face. This situation was so domestic that it would make him blush, if his brain wasn’t still hazy with sleep. He blinked slowly, without breaking the eye contact.

“Good morning,” whispered the blonde, his thumb brushing Changbin’s cheekbone two times, before rolling away. 

“You want some breakfast?” he added, stretching his arms, then his legs. Changbin nodded, yawning. 

“I’ll shout when it’s ready,” announced Felix, and with another grin sent his way, he left the room. 

Changbin got up slowly, sitting at the edge of the bed. He looked around the room. It was actually pretty cozy. How did Felix manage to make his dorm so nice, Changbin had no idea, but hey, he wasn’t gonna complain. His eyes landed on a small pile of clothes lying on a lone chair. He glanced back at his pyjama pants, and his hand unconsciously fumbling with the sleeve of his hoodie, that barely reached his wrist. He really didn’t want to spend any more time in this. 

He looked at the clothes again, calculating. Felix surely wouldn’t mind if he borrowed some of them, _right_? He could just give them back tomorrow, after washing them. 

He stood up, and walked towards the pile of clothes, before quickly going through all of them, until he found something that he liked (and by that I mean, something that hopefully would be only a size too big for him). 

After he was done, he looked at himself in Felix’s mirror that was standing by the door. He snatched some skinny jeans and a green sweater, the thing, as he suspected, too big for him, making him look even smaller than he already was. His hair was still a wild mess that he didn’t dare touch, but his eye bags seemed to be a lot less visible now. He left the room and headed towards kitchen, from where he could hear some humming. Before he could go in, though, the humming changed into actual words. Felix’s deep voice, that Changbin thought would be perfect for rapping, sounded angelic when he sang. His heart stuttered in his chest, and he stood in front of the door, unmoving, just appreciating the blonde’s voice, until the singing abruptly stopped and Felix made a satisfied sound. Not even five seconds later, the boy appeared in front of him, his face going from shocked to flustered in a matter of seconds. 

“You look… Good,” he muttered, scratching his reddening neck, then continued “And hey, I was about to tell you that breakfast’s ready, but you’re already here” the blonde chuckled, before his hands caught Changbin’s fingers and pulling him into the kitchen. The older boy quickly dig into the pancakes, while Felix sat on the table and stared at him with a grin. 

A few seconds later, Changbin heard a shutter go off. He looked up at Felix, who had his phone in his hands, an embarrassed smile on his lips. 

“Did you just take a photo of me eating?” he asked, the whole thing sounding ridiculous to him. 

“You looked so cute, I just couldn’t resist,” explained the younger, scratching his neck again. It seemed to be some sort of a nervous habit to him. Changbin reached out for Felix’s phone, before turning and directing it at his face, making sure that the other boy was visible in the frame. He smiled, throwing a peace sign, and quickly took a photo. Then he turned again, so he was facing Felix, and handed him back his phone, while the blonde was watching him with a confused look. 

“So you wouldn’t have to take more pictures of me,” he murmured, and that was all it took for Felix to start furiously typing a text to someone. 

“Excuse me,” he mumbled, barely audible, adding something about going to the toilet, before he quickly power walked out of the room, leaving Changbin in a puzzled state. 

His phone lit up with a notification.

**Chat: Old but Gold**

**bittersweet:** d u de  
**bittersweet:** what did you do to felix  
**saltyaf:** I didn’t do anything??   
**bittersweet:** he just texted me your name with a bunch of keysmashes before saying that he’s gonna die  
**bittersweet:** you must’ve done at least s o m e t h i n g  
**saltyaf:** well  
**saltyaf:** I took a selfie with his phone  
**saltyaf:** in his clothes  
**saltyaf:** with him in the background  
**saltyaf:** oh also i made a peace sign  
**saltyaf:** but that’s all  
**saltyaf:** he literally ran away just seconds after  
**bittersweet:** hm  
**bittersweet:** that explained some things  
**saltyaf:** what do u mean??   
**bittersweet:** ;) 

Changbin cursed Chan in his head. _That asshole._

≫≫

When Felix came back, his hair was an even bigger mess than yesterday, his right hand nervously combing through it. His ears were slightly pinkish, and his gaze didn’t stay too long on Changbin, instead it danced around the room, visibly flustered. 

Changbin stood up, and took a few steps towards the other boy, his hands reaching up to his blonde locks and patting them down, until they were somewhat back to looking socially acceptable. Felix sent him a thankful grin. Changbin didn’t ask, and Felix seemed grateful for that. 

Changbin put his used plate in the sink, neither of them bothering to clean the slowly growing pile of dishes. They could just do it later. 

“Hey, draw me like one of your French girls, Changbin,” suddenly said the blonde, draping himself dramatically over the table, before wiggling his eyebrows at him. 

“I’m a rapper, not an artist, though,” the older replied, which in turn made Felix pout. 

“You’re no fun,” he muttered. If Changbin tried to choke him after that, nobody needed to know. The kiss he planted on the boy’s cheek a few seconds later stayed in between them, too.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> before y'all read this chapter, I just wanted to say that I was really unsatisfied with how it came out, and I just had no energy to write it again, so the second part was actually supposed to be the next chapter, but, yeah. you're getting both as an apology for making you read the first part

**Chat: Old but Gold**

**bittersweet:** minho was asking about you  
**saltyaf:** me? why me?  
**bittersweet:** it’s probably because you’re jisung’s best friend  
**bittersweet:** i mean i’m not 100% sure that’s why  
**bittersweet:** but it’s pretty much possible  
**saltyaf:** u can give him my number if he still wants to talk to me  
**bittersweet:** will do

Changbin looked away from his phone. Why would Minho try to talk to find a way to talk to him, out of all people? They don’t even know each other that well. Sure, they hang out, but with others, at the whole group of nine. They never actually talked to each other one on one. 

After a few minutes his phone lit up again. 

**Chat: We know each other but we really don’t**

**Minho:** Hey  
**Changbin:** hello  
**Changbin:** what did you want to talk about?  
**Minho:** Actually, can I just call you? I don’t really want to talk about this through text.  
**Changbin:** sure

Not even three seconds went by, and his phone was already ringing. He put it on speaker, because he didn’t feel like holding it to his ear, especially if it was supposed to be a long talk. 

“I’m worried about him,” were the first words that came out of Minho’s mouth. 

“You mean Jisung?” asked Changbin, just to be sure. 

Minho’s sigh filled his living room. 

“Yeah,” he whispered. Changbin might have never heard his voice sound this way, but he fully knew what emotions filled the simple word. He knew that tone of voice, he’s heard both himself and Jisung use it way too much for his liking. 

“You want to know why he behaves the way he does, don’t you?” 

There was a moment of silence, and Changbin guessed that Minho was probably nodding before realizing that the other can’t see him. 

“I really don’t want to be privy, but… I’m just worried,” he mumbled, voice sounding kind of hoarse. 

“It’s not really my place to tell you this, so you should ask Jisung if you want specifics, but,” he took a deep breath, then continued, “he did… Have some issues, when he was younger. You know, unsupportive family, this type of stuff. And it kinda fucked him up, in the end.” 

Minho let out a light gasp at his words, then silence took over for a few seconds. But Changbin wasn’t done yet. 

“Also, there’s one thing you need to know before you go and talk with Jisung. He… Used to harm himself. So please, be gentle. You’re a really important person to him. Don’t mess it up.” 

He could hear Minho gulp, the sound clear through the phone. 

“I won’t,” he promised. 

They sat in silence for the next few minutes, Changbin letting Minho take his time to take in the new information. Changbin could hear a door being closed somewhere outside of his dorm, but didn’t pay any attention to it. 

“And Changbin?” Minho’s voice echoed around the room. 

“Yeah?” 

“What’s going on between you and Felix?” 

Changbin was too stunned with the sudden question that he didn’t even hear the thud and a yelped curse that was slightly muffled by the thin wall between the dorms. 

“I… I don’t know,” he replied honestly. 

“Tell me when you figure it out” 

“Okay” 

≫≫

Changbin really wanted to make some brownies. The problem here was that he had no idea how to actually do it, and he truly didn’t want them to end up like his last muffins did. 

He looked around the room. Bubbles was sitting on one of the chairs, Caramel chasing around it after his own tail. The other three kittens, that he didn’t named yet, were currently sleeping in his bedroom. His phone was lying on top of the table, softly playing Taeyang’s Eyes Nose Lips from his _Calm The Fuck Down_ playlist. He sighed, defeated. He was about to give up when he heard a knock on his door. 

“Come in, it’s open,” he shouted, looking at his fingers that were covered in flour. He really wasn’t made for this. 

“Oh, you’re baking something?” asked an already so, so familiar voice. He glanced at Felix, who was leaning against the door, an interested glint in his eyes. Changbin looked away. 

“Not anymore, I suck at this,” he replied, coming to the sink and washing his hands. From the corner of his eye, he could see Felix crouching next to Caramel and staring at the cat fondly. 

“You should come to my dorm sometime, we could bake something together, if you’d want to. It’s pretty easy when you get the hang of it,” he suggested while petting the cat. He touched Caramel’s nose with a pad of his finger, muttering a silent _boop_. Changbin’s heart did a flip at the cute sight. 

That’s when Taeyang’s song ended, and another one started playing. Changbin instantly knew which one it is. 

“Oh lord, is this I Wanna Be Yours by Arctic Monkeys?” perked up the blonde. He stood up and walked towards Changbin with a grin, stopping directly in front of him. The older’s eyebrows shot up when Felix wrapped his hands around his chest, burrowing his face into Changbin’s hair, who let out a confused sound. 

“I love this song,” mumbled Felix, like it was all the explanation needed. After a few seconds, Changbin awkwardly hugged him back, letting his head fall on the other boy’s shoulder, before completely melting in his arms. The feeling of safety came back, and he wanted the song to never end. Felix started to swing slowly to the music. They circled around the kitchen, as he felt Felix’s hand sneak up and tangle his fingers in the other boy’s hair. He let out a satisfied hum, then brushed Felix’s neck with his nose, the blonde letting out a soft chuckle. 

“That tickles,” he murmured into Changbin’s ear, who replied with a huff, and snuggled closer. 

The song ended, another one already filling the kitchen, but Changbin wasn’t able to hear it. All he knew was Felix, and his arms around him. 

But the boy took a step back, the hand that was previously playing with Changbin’s locks slided slowly to cup his jaw, and the blonde planted a gentle kiss on his nose, then pulled away with a smile on his lips. His dark eyes shined with an emotion that Changbin wasn’t sure what it was, but it still made his heart melt, and when the blonde fully released him, he instantly missed the warmth of Felix’s embrance, but he didn’t want to sound clingy, so he just smiled back. 

That night, Changbin couldn’t sleep again, but for an entirely different reason than usual. 

**Chat: We know each other but we really don’t**

**Chagbin:** i might actually have a crush on felix


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)

“I thought you already had a crush on him since you saw him, though?” asked a confused Jisung. Since Changbin couldn’t sleep anyway, and had to talk about it with someone, he decided to visit the younger, since the other boy didn’t mind. Jisung was used to Changbin coming to him at weird hours, and he always let him in and listened to whatever was troubling him.

“It was a different part of crush,” muttered Changbin, and the younger shot him a confused look from where he was sitting on the couch. Changbin sighed, before walking closer and sitting next to him. Jisung instantly turned his whole body in his direction, to show that he was fully listening. 

“At first, it was just. You know, when you look at a person, and you’re like, whoa, they’re really cute, like?” Jisung nodded slowly, and the older continued, “yeah, it was like that. I just really appreciated his good looks, his smile, how his eyes crinkled when he laughed, all that. But I saw him that one night when I couldn’t fall asleep, and he honestly looked like a mess, but I still found him the most beautiful thing. And now, now it’s not only about the way he looks, or how he does things, now I just. I have these feelings, when he’s with me. Like I really want to hold his hand, to tangle my fingers in his hair, to smile at something I said. I want him to wrap his arms around me and stay like this forever. I want him to tell me good morning when he wakes up beside me, and I want to be able to tell him good night when I cuddle with him in his bed. I want to spend my time with him, to laugh with him, and I just. He makes my heart flutter, and I’m really happy when I see him, but now I feel kind of selfish for wanting all those things. It’s too much. I feel like I’m falling for him, but I don’t want to ruin this friendship. What if he only sees me as a friend? Then all my feelings would make him uncomfortable.” 

Changbin ended his rant, taking a deep breath, then exhaling slowly. Jisung looked at him with a sad glint in his eyes. The older knew he understood what he felt. The boy might feel even worse than him, considering that Jisung fell for two boys, that didn’t even talk to him for such a long time. 

Jisung reached over, bringing the older closer to himself, and hugging him tightly. Changbin immediately hugged him back, letting his head fall on the other boy’s shoulder. 

“Don’t feel guilty for your own feelings. Love isn’t what you should feel guilty about,” murmured Jisung. 

“I know, but that doesn’t stop me from feeling bad about it,” replied Changbin, his eyes starting to get watery. 

“It just feels like I want too much, like it makes me selfish for doing so,” his voice cracked by the end of the sentence, and he sniffed, trying to stop the tears from running. Jisung pet his hair comfortingly. 

“It’s okay, it’s really okay, ” he mumbled, repeating it over and over as Changbin sobbed in his arms, his left hand caressing the boy’s back. He didn’t pay any attention to the fact that his shirt was getting wet, or that he was tired from lack of sleep. His crying friend was more important than that. 

“I just want to stop feeling this way,” whispered Changbin, his voice trembling, as his hand rubbed at one of his eyes to stop the crying. The younger quickly pulled it away, and looked him in the eyes. 

“It’s okay,” he said again, and the other nodded, slowly starting to calm down from his breakdown. He sniffed, curling on himself even more, hugging Jisung tighter than he was already. 

“We’re both fools in love, aren’t we?” he sighed, burrowing his face into Jisung’s shirt. 

Jisung’s silence was an answer enough. 

≫≫

He woke up alone. There was a blanket that someone, probably Jisung put on him, but it was still confusing, since Jisung was always up for cuddles, and he never stopped them first, unless there was something important that came up. 

“Thank you,” he heard Jisung’s voice coming from the kitchen. Whatever the boy was talking about, he sounded really grateful, and that made Changbin even more confused. He slowly sat up, and waited for the younger to come back, which didn’t take long. When Jisung came in, there was a soft, but also kind of sad smile, that didn’t disappear when he saw that Changbin was already awake. 

“Minho called,” he explained, and Changbin pet the empty spot beside him, which Jisung quickly took. The younger sighed, and Changbin stared at him patiently. 

“I told him, you know, about my father,” he started, looking at his hands, “and about what I used to do to myself. He listened to me calmly, even though I could tell that it was a lot for him to take in. I also told him about me being poly and guess what? He said that I’m amazing, that I have so much love to give, I feel like I’m falling for him even more,” the last part was said with a smile, though it wasn’t really a happy smile, like he was pitying himself. Changbin reached out to held Jisung’s hand in his. 

“He also told me that it was you who told him to just go talk to me, so, thank you. I’m really glad that you did,” the younger looked up at him, and Changbin nodded silently. 

They spend the rest of the day with soft eyes and sad smiles.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **!!There's a panic attack in this chapter!!**  
>  And it's not only a mention this time

“Oh my God, they’re so cute!” technically, it wasn’t a screech, but Chan’s voice indeed was high pitched as he sat in front of the kittens. The little balls of fluff instantly came up to him, playing with the sleeve of his hoodie or sitting in his lap and staring at him curiously. Chan looked like was about to cry from happiness.

At first the meeting was supposed to be about Changbin’s recently discovered feelings, but the oldest boy was gone as quick as he saw the cats. Changbin sighed, resigned, before sharing a look with Jisung, who shrugger with a face that was clearly meant to say _you done lost him_.

**Chat: the boy with the brightest smile**

**bin:** hey  
**bin:** do u wanna come and baby my cats  
**bin:** bc like chan just got to them and I’m lowkey concernd

He heard a muffled screech from the dorm next door. Jisung jumped, alarmed, almost dropping the tea he had in his hands, but he caught it at the last second. The boy glanced at Changbin, looking like he just witnessed someone get stabbed. 

**freckles:** omg yES  
**freckles:** I’d l o v e to  
**freckles:** let me just throw on some normal clothes real quick  
**bin:** kay  
**bin:** u scared jisung tho  
**freckles:** kjsdhjkdfhs sorry

It only took two minutes for Felix to come in running, looking out of breath, even though he literally lived next door, but Changbin didn’t dare ask what got him so tired. When the blonde saw them, he shoot them a quick smile, that had Changbin’s stomach doing some weird acrobatics, and dashed towards Chan sitting with the kittens. 

“Cat-zoned?” mumbled Jisung quietly, so only Changbin could hear. The latter glared at him, which made him snort. Changbin might have, accidentally of course, kicked him in the ass because of that. The Australian duo didn’t even seem to notice their little fight, nor the yelp that Jisung let out before hitting the older’s head. 

The cat fight only stopped when they heard Felix’s coo. They looked in its direction and saw that one of the kittens fell asleep in Chan’s arms, while Felix was lying on the floor, Caramel laying on his back. The blonde reached out and scratched the sleeping cat behind its ear, and the kitten turned slightly, so its tummy was up and easier to pet. Jisung made some kind of a squeak before running up to the two and cooing at the cat even more than Felix already was. The blonde murmured something in English, directing it to Chan, and Changbin thought he heard ‘cute’, but wasn’t sure. Although, if it actually was what he said, then he agreed. The three boys were acting so cute, that even Changbin had to bite his lip not to make some _oh my lord that’s so cute_ noises. 

He fished out his phone from his pocket and quickly took a photo of his idiot friends, before joining them in being absolutely weak for the kittens. 

≫≫

Changbin was panicking.

He was sure that he saw all of the kittens sleep with their mother just a few seconds ago, and yet, one of them wasn’t here. And wasn’t even anywhere else where Changbin looked. Not in the kitchen, not on any of the chairs in his living room, not in the bathroom – not even under his bed. 

So, yeah. He really was panicking. 

The lost kitten was the one with fur as white as its mother. He hadn’t given it a name yet, though he was considering Snow, since he found it cute, and it fit. 

But he couldn’t name it if it was gone. 

He looked frantically around the room, checking every corner of his dorm, just to find nothing. He was close to breaking down. What if the cat left the building and got hurt? What if it won’t come back? God, Changbin didn’t know what he would do if it turned out like this. He already felt the guilt sipping into him, and he clenched his hair in his hands. Fuck, it’s all his fault, he should’ve been more careful, why can’t he do anything right? Why did things like that always happen to him? He let out a light sob as his body started to tremble, feeling his self control slowly slip away as his thoughts got darker and darker, until he fell to his knees in the middle of his living room. Tears were streaming down his face, but he didn’t pay any attention to them. His hands twitched unconsciously, while his breaths became quick and shallow, and, fuck, that’s too much, everything’s too much. 

He doesn’t notice when the door to his dorm is opened, or when there’s a loud gasp and a quiet mewl when a cat gets dropped gently to the ground. He doesn’t even notice when someone pries his hands away from his hair and throws their arms around his shoulders, holding him close, he just cries, and cries, until he feels so tired that his head hurts, and he just wants to sleep without ever waking up. He snuggles closer, sobbing, as the person murmurs comforting words into his ear, that slowly start to get to him, and he’s calming down, it’s okay, he’s okay, nothing’s happening, he’s fine. 

It takes some more time for him to fully calm down, and he looks at the person that’s holding him, feeling glad when he recognizes Felix. 

It’s okay, the boy says, and Changbin thinks that yes, it really is. 

They stay like this for a while. Changbin doesn’t know how much time has passed, maybe it was an hour, maybe it was only 20 minutes, but they don’t go anywhere, Felix’s hand rubbing circles into his back, him breathing in Felix’s scent. He smells like home, Changbin notices. 

“Thank you,” he mumbles after some more time. 

“You don’t have to thank me, everyone would do the same thing.” 

Changbin looks up at him with a sad smile. He doesn’t have the heart to tell the boy that no, not everyone is as kind as he thinks they are. 

“I found your cat, by the way. Is that why you had a panic attack?” asked the blonde, brushing Changbin’s hair out of his eyes. The older winced slightly, before nodding. 

“Yeah,” he admitted, took a deep breath, then continued, “I can’t even put into words how thankful I am for what you did. Like, I could actually kiss you.” 

“Then do it,” murmured the younger, his face unreadable, and Changbin looks at him startled. They don’t say anything for a few awkward seconds, until Felix tilted his head a little, and oh, okay, that’s what he meant. A kiss on the cheek, of course, nothing else. 

Changbin does exactly that, even though for some reason he feels disappointed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm actually sorry for this chapter, like, it was supposed to be all cute and stuff, but I kind of wrote a panic attack in the middle and I just,, feel shitty hA


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter feels kinda like a filler but that's the only thing I could write today aaaaaaa  
> it's also unbeta'd bc i'm too tired to do it rn sorry kjgsdhksg

Warm. That’s what Changbin feels like as he wakes up. His eyes slowly flutter open, and he blinks a few times, before looking around. There’s an arm thrown around his waist, and he can feel soft puffs of breath hitting his neck. The body pressed against his back shuffles closer with a quiet murmur, clearly sleeping. Changbin doesn’t need to check to know that it’s Felix.

After the panic attack, Changbin still was a little jumpy the whole evening, so Felix insisted on staying with him, saying that he doesn’t want to leave the other in such a state. Changbin was so tired that he didn’t even fight him on that, yet he still felt kind of selfish for letting him stay. Because, yes, somewhere deep inside of him really wanted the younger boy to stay with him, to cuddle together on his bed, share their warmth – but the other probably wouldn’t do it anymore if he knew about Changbin’s feelings. That’s why it made him feel selfish for doing so. 

Changbin’s phone pinged with a notification. Since they didn’t bother to change their clothes yesterday, the phone was still in his pocket – and he was so grateful for that, because he’s pretty sure that if it was out of reach he wouldn’t wake up Felix just to get his phone and one of his friends would kill him later. 

He pulled it out and looked at the screen – it was a video chat from Jisung. He accepted and soon he saw a smiling Jisung. He was obviously still in his pyjama, his hair kind of smushed in one place, probably by sleeping on this side, but the boy didn’t seem bothered by it. 

“Who you cuddling with?” he asked, a grin on his lips, his voice strangely energetic for, Changbin quickly checked the time, 7 am. Instead of replying, he just moved his arm a bit so Felix’s sleeping face could be seen on the screen. Jisung’s grin only widened at the sight. 

“Aww, he looks so cute like that,” he cooed, then looked back at Changbin. The younger’s eyes were sparkling happily, and Changbin felt confusion slowly seep into him, since never forget to remind him how much he hates mornings. Apparently, Jisung could tell what was going on his mind. 

“I have something like, really important, to tell you,” he announced. Changbin replied with a hum. 

“Okay, so, Minho came to visit me yesterday, right? Spoiler alert, he stayed the night and went to the toilet now, so I don’t have much time to ramble, but back to the story. We did some stupid shit, like dancing, which when I think of it now, was actually really fucking stupid considering that my knee still isn’t fully healed,” he winced at that slightly, his face scrunched adorably, before continuing, “so when my knee started to hurt Minho didn’t let me dance more, just told me to sit while he found a perfect movie to watch. It was some kind of a romance between two girls, one of them just broke up with her boyfriend, and did I tell you how fucking annoying that dude was? Like I wanted to punch him so hard, the girl was so heartbroken, wait, no, that’s a story for another day, but like, back to what I was talking about, while the movie was playing we just started cuddling, I don’t even exactly when, it just happened. And after the movie ended, we talked a lot. Like, you know, deep shit kind of thing. And you won’t believe this, but like, at one point, in the middle of my rambling, I just suddenly realized that he was just staring at me with this fond look on his face? I got so flustered because of it that I just stopped, and then, oh God, he just put a hand on my cheek and said that he could listen to me talk for hours, like? That was so…?” Jisung’s cheeks got a pinkish tint on them now, and he took a deep breath to calm himself down, “And then, when I didn’t reply he just told me how much he liked me?” his voice cracked at the end of the sentence, and his face brightened with a soft smile. 

“So, you’re like, together now?” asked Changbin, when Jisung seemed to end his rant. The younger let out some sort of a squeak. 

“Yeah, we’re together, can you believe this, I’ve got a boyfriend now,” Changbin smiled unconsciously as his best friend looked at his hands with a grin on his face. 

“Also, I told him about my crush on Jeongin, since, you know, I’m not gonna hide it from him, that’d be fucked up. And he was so supportive! He even said he’s gonna be my wingman!” a light laugh filled Changbin’s room, “My own boyfriend is also gonna be my wingman, that’s so funny. Also, hi there, Felix.” 

Changbin quickly turned around to see Felix’s face a few inches in front of him. The boy wasn’t looking at him though, so the blush that spread around his cheeks went, hopefully, unnoticed. 

The blonde hummed in greeting, brushing away some of his hair from his eyes, a slight pout on his lips. He probably wasn’t a morning person, either. 

“I’m really glad to hear that,” murmured Changbin, looking back at Jisung, his gaze softening at the gentle smile on the other’s face. The younger pointed subtly at his own cheeks, and Changbin slowly touched his own. They were still hot. So, his blush didn’t go unnoticed. _Fuck._

That’s when they heard some faint footsteps. Jisung looked at something off-screen and waved at them quickly. 

“Minho’s coming back, bye guys!” he whispered, smiling at them one last time, before ending the call. 

The two boys sat a few minutes in silence, both still too sleepy to actually do anything. 

“That was nice,” commented Felix, Changbin muffled his snort with his hand. 

“I’m so happy for him,” he mumbled softly, feeling Felix’s intense stare at the back of his head. 

“I hope they’re not the only ones that’ll get their happy ending here,” was the blonde’s reply. Changbin felt his heart both jump hopefully and sink in disappointment. 

“Me too.”


	16. Chapter 16

After that, they fell asleep again. It was just too comfortable to get up now. Changbin was back to being Felix’s pillow, and they didn’t wake up until somewhere around 1 pm. They still didn’t feel like getting up, though.

“The whole team’s meeting up at Chan’s place, you going?” muttered the blonde a few minutes into the silence. Changbin turned to face him, the other gazing at him sleepily. He reached out to boop the younger boy’s nose without a second thought, which in turn made Felix giggle. 

“Are you?” he asked and Felix replied with a nod, “then yes.” 

Felix smiled at him softly and they stayed cuddling for some more time. 

≫≫

“Nice to see that you both made it here,” said Jisung with a grin at the sight of them standing before him. He took a step back and ushered them inside. Chan’s house was a pretty cozy place. It wasn’t big, but it wasn’t small either. There wasn’t a single piece of trash lying on the floor, and it was full of blankets and cushions everywhere. The smell inside was nice, something like vanilla and cinnamon. Changbin breathed in deeply and nodded, satisfied. He missed spending his time here.

It was already 5pm, and the boys only got up when they had to change their clothes and actually go out. They were both in Changbin’s clothes, since Felix didn’t want to go to his dorm for his own. Changbin’s heart fluttered at the sight of Felix in one of his flannels. He cursed it in his head. 

“Barely,” murmured Felix and Jisung shot him a confused look. 

“Didn’t really want to get up,” the blonde explained with a shrug. Jisung nodded, a curious glint in his eyes. Changbin glared at him before the boy could say anything. Jisung just replied with a smirk. 

“We ordered some pizza!” shouted Chan from the kitchen, and they immediately went there. Everyobedy was already here. Minho gave Jisung a quick peck before going back to talking with Jeongin as Hyunjin was sitting in Woojin’s lap, looking pretty satisfied. Chan was staring at the oldest with some sort of longing. Changbin told himself to ask him about it later. 

He sat next to Seungmin by the table. The other was looking at his phone, fiddling with his sleeves as his left leg kept on bouncing impatiently. 

“Why does it take so long for the pizza to get here,” the boy whined and Changbin chuckled under his breath. 

“Guess we’ll have to wait some more,” he responded as the other whined even louder. 

“But it’s already been, like, 20 minutes,” he mumbled, crossing his arms, making Changbin laugh even more. That’s when Felix came, quickly sitting in Changbin’s lap, and throwing his arms around his neck with a grin. 

“Isn’t there an empty seat?” asked Changbin, pointing in the general direction of a lone chair that was standing next to them. Felix shrugged, then wiggled his eyebrows at him. The older had to turn his face so the other wouldn’t see him blush. 

Suddenly Minho’s voice interrupted his flustered thoughts. 

“See, kiddo, our dear Jisung here would love to spend more time with you,” he said pretty loudly with a wink attached to the end of the sentence. Jisung let out a yelp while Jeongin’s face started growing red and they shared a look before both quickly looked away. 

“I don’t see why would he, though?” Jeongin’s response was high pitched as he tried to control his voice, clearly failing. The boy looked around the room, not meeting Jisung’s gaze. Minho nudged him lightly with a cheeky smile on his face. 

“I donk’t know, maybe because he thinks you’re cute?” Jeongin didn’t get to reply, as their conversation was interrupted by a knock on the door. 

“I’ll get it,” shouted Chan, seemingly not noticing the awkward silence between Jisung and Jeongin. 

“That was. Unexpected.” 

Felix’s mutter was all that was needed for everyone to go back to casually talking. Jisung was firing some jokes at Hyunjin, probably to ignore that this situation ever happened. The tremble of his hands didn’t go unnoticed by Changbin, though. 

“Since the pizza’s already here, why don’t we play some game?” Chan’s voice filled the room as he came in. Woojin made a confused sound, hugging Hyunjin closer to himself than he already was. 

“Truth or dare!” shouted Felix, before he and Jisung started chanting it like it was some weird mantra. Changbin sighed, sharing a look with Seungmin. 

“No weird dares though,” murmured Chan, accompanied by a synched screech of victory from the wildest two. They all sat in a circle, while everyone munched on their own pizza slices. 

The first person to get picked was Woojin. 

“Truth,” he said, looking curiously at Chan, who was thinking intensively about the question. 

“What’s with you and Hyunjin?” he finally asked. Woojin’s comfortable grip on the other boy’s hand tightened slightly as he straightened in his seat. 

“We’re a couple. For like, two weeks now,” he replied slowly, and the whole group cheered in their own ways. Felix fist bumped Hyunjin as Jisung and Minho talked animatedly how they were a new couple as well. Woojin seemed happy to hear that, his face brightened with a grin. 

Changbin glanced at Chan from the corner of his eye. The older’s face was schooled into a calm smile, but his hands gripped his sleeves so tightly, his knuckles became white. Changbin’ll definitely ask him about that later. 

“So, Jeongin, truth or dare?” asked Woojin after a few seconds. 

“Dare!” shouted Jisung before the boy could even say anything, which cause the younger to look at him, betrayed. 

“Dare it is,” Woojin looked at both of them with a slight smirk, before continuing, “I dare you to sit in Jisung’s lap for the rest of the evening.” 

The two boys colored visibly, while Minho and Woojin shared a sneaky highfive. Even Chan cracked a smile. 

It took a few seconds, but in the end, the youngest got up and took some shaky steps, before carefully sitting at the edge of Jisung’s knees. 

“That’s cheating,” murmured Felix, then quickly pushed him further, and Jisung had to wrap his hands around the other boy so they wouldn’t fall. Jeongin shot Felix a glare, his cheeks red and puffed out, making it look more like a pout. 

“Well then, Felix, truth or dare?” he hissed out. 

“Dare,” and, okay, that was a realy stupid thing to do, thought Changbin. Jeongin was clearly pissed a him, why would he choose a dare if the younger was basically a ticking bomb now? 

“I dare you to kiss Changbin. Five times. On different places of his body. You get to choose where.” 

Changbin stilled. He wasn’t expecting this. He wasn’t prepared for anything like that to happen. Oh, fuck. 

He shot Felix a look and okay, _jesus_ , that’s happening, he’s already getting closer, what will he do? 

“Close your eyes,” whispered the blonde, and Changbin instantly did so, without any second thought. It was quiet - nobody said anything, God, they were probably staring right at them. His cheeks were growing hotter, before a pair of hands covered them, cupping his face gently. He felt a light kiss on his forehead and oh, his lips were as soft as he imagined they’d be. 

Then he felt the boy’s lips leave a quick kiss on both of his eyelids. If he had any control over his body right now, he’d probably coo from the cuteness. But he was sitting, back straight, as his hands twitched nervously. He could tell something was going to happen, but he just didn’t know what. 

Next Felix pecked his nose, and he scrunched his face slightly at the, actually kind of ticklish, sensation. 

And then there was a pause, as if the boy was calculating something. Changbin was about to open his eyes and ask what’s wrong, when he felt a slight pressure on the side of his mouth. He felt warmth spread around his face as the blonde’s lips lingered on his own, barely moving. And suddenly, just as quick as they appeared, they were gone, and it was too soon, too little for the little selfish voice in the back of his head, and before Felix could fully pull away, he stopped him by laying a hand on his neck, and pressed a quick peck on the boy’s lips that parted slightly in a silent gasp.

Realizing what he’s just done, he quickly pulled back, just to see Felix looking at him with rosy cheeks and wide eyes as he touched his mouth. Changbin avoided his stare, looking aroung the room. The rest didn’t seem to notice what exactly he did, the only person looking at him with shock written across his face was Jisung. He cleared his throat awkwardly.

“I’m feeling pretty hungry, anyone with me? Yeah, let me just, get myself another slice of pizza real quick,” he muttered nervously, before running towards the kitchen.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _choo choo it's the pain train_

Turns out, he didn’t get any pizza, actually, he just got a glass of water that he was slowly sipping from, looking at the floor in disappointment, hoping that it could just swallow him, so he wouldn’t have to go through this embarrassment. He didn’t know how much time has passed since he ran away to hide in the kitchen, his wild thoughts too much to feel the time slipping away. Apparently, he must’ve been here for long, because a few seconds later he heard footsteps, that were clearly getting closer.

“Is everything alright?” murmured Chan as he came in, looking around the room. Changbin just glanced at him, before quickly looking away without any response, his legs dangling in the air unconsciously. Chan took a few cautious steps towards him, sitting on the counter next to Changbin and patting his shoulder with a concerned look on his face.

“Pining really is the worst, isn’t it?” he asked gently, his hand rubbing comforting circles into the other’s back. Changbin let out a light whine. 

“I kissed him, Chan, I was an idiot and I couldn’t control myself, and I fucking kissed him, how could I face him now?” Changbin’s fingers ruffled his hair as his gaze was locked on the floor. Chan carefully pulled his hand away. 

“You can just tell him. I’m sure he’s gonna understand, he doesn’t seem like a person that’d cut you out just because of that,” he replied calmly, patting his arm twice. Changbin glanced at him from the corner of his eye.

“What about you? Why don’t you tell Woojin, then?” 

The question made the older still, his face unreadable, as he stared at the wall quietly. A few seconds passed by without him saying anything and Changbin twitched nervously, uncomfortable in the sudden silence that filled the room. 

“He and Hyunjin… they seem like a really good couple, I’m not going to intervene, I just… don’t want to ruin this,” murmured Chan. 

“But you can’t just sit quietly and admire him from afar,” the younger shot back, trying to get Chan to look him in the eyes. He failed, though. 

“Really, as long as he’s happy, I’m happy. My feelings don’t matter here,” responded Chan with an, obviously fake, smile on his face. Changbin had no time to protest, because the other quickly stood up and walked away. Before leaving the room, though, he stopped, adding slowly, 

“Come on, we’re having a dance battle, you should join us.” 

≫≫

It took him some time, but in the end, he came back to where the others were in Chan’s living room. The curtains were closed, the only source of light the red fairy lights hanging from the ceiling. The music was blasting out of the speakers, and Changbin wondered how had he not heard it before. Minho and Hyunjin were currently on the center of the room, both breathing heavily, as they took turns to show off their skills. The rest of the group was standing around them, betting on who would win. Changbin felt someone’s gaze on himself, and turned around to see Felix staring at him with a calculative look. The older quickly looked back at the dancing duo, flustered. He still didn’t know how to explain himself. 

After some more dancing, the two decided that they’ll just end this fight some other time, and the rest joined them, swaying to the music. 

Changbin might have seen Felix dance before, when they practiced, but that doesn’t change the fact that he was impressed when the boy started to freestyle with Jisung. His moves were smooth, and matched perfectly to the beat of the music. Jisung threw Felix a grin before doing a wave with his arms, and catching the other’s hand, as Felix continued the boy’s move with a matching smile. Not long after that, their dancing became more serious, which almost made Changbin choke. He nudged a slightly blushing Minho and they shared a knowing look. 

That’s when the song changed to something slower and Jisung took Jeongin by the hand, before hugging him close with a soft smile and swaying in the spot, the younger clearly becoming even more red than the lights already made him look. 

Minho kicked Changbin in the shin, and he looked at him betrayed. The other nodded in the direction of the rest of the boys with a _quick, look_ face. 

Changbin glanced where he was pointing and his breath got knocked away from his chest. There danced Felix, smoothly and slowly, as he stared at Changbin, his gaze piercing right through him. Changbin wished he could look away, but it was impossible, as if the younger was making sure that the only thing he paid attention to was himself. The blonde stopped dancing, and he walked towards Changbin, standing just in front of him, without breaking the eye contact. Changbin gulped as the boys’ knuckles brushed against his cheek gently. Felix shuffled closer, so he could comfortably whisper into his ear. He didn’t have to keep that quiet, since the music was still playing, but Changbin didn’t question his actions. 

“Why do you keep running from me?” asked the boy, his hand cupping the other’s jaw. 

“I don’t… I don’t know,” muttered back Changbin, suddenly feeling helpless. Felix left a light kiss to his ear, before pulling away. There was something akin to disappointment shining in his eyes. 

Changbin didn’t get to ask him about it, as the boy walked away, leaving him standing in the corner of the room, confused.


	18. Chapter 18

“How did you know that Hyunjin liked you back?” asked Changbin after the meeting slowly approached it’s end. Chan, Minho and Jeongin were cleaning up whatever the group knocked off or spilled while dancing, stacking the empty pizza boxes by the trashcan. Hyunjin left for the bathroom as Felix and Seungmin went back to their own homes. Jisung announced that he’s staying the night, crashing on the couch. His soft snores filled the room as Jeongin and Minho glanced at him a few times, adoration clear on their faces, before they shared a look. _Just confess,_ mouthed Minho, to which Jeongin replied by looking away with a blush.

“It’s… complicated. I didn’t really know that he liked me back, I just kinda hoped he did,” murmured Woojin, staring at the ceiling, deep in thoughts. Changbin looked at him, waiting patiently for him to finish his explanation. 

“He and I did the same stuff you’d do with your best friend, but my heart would always race as he held my hand or hugged me just a little tighter than what you’d call platonic. He must’ve seen it, probably, because I really can’t hide my feelings, even if I try, so he confessed first. And believe me, it was actually kind of funny, because I was so stunned that at first I just said thanks, before apologizing and basically shouting that I liked him back. But in the end, it all worked out,” he paused for a few seconds, a silly smile on his lips, as his gaze softened, then he continued, “I think it’s actually the smallest things that can help you realize how much someone appreciates you. Like remembering that thing you told them a few months ago, of how they always check up on you, how they seem to notice the little things about you that people usually don’t pay any attention to. All of those things made me hope that I wasn’t imagining anything, that Hyunjin really felt as much to me as I did to him. And I’m so happy that he does.” 

Changbin nodded slowly, deep in thoughts. Did Felix do these kind of things? The boy really seemed to pay a lot of attention to him. And he was always there, when Changbin needed someone’s companion. Could that be a coincidence? Or maybe the blonde actually felt the same way about him? 

Changbin shaked his head to get rid of those thoughts. He couldn’t just foolishly hope for the blonde to like him back, especially if this hope could get crushed any moment. 

“Thank you, I’m really happy for you two,” muttered Changbin truthfully, and Woojin smiled at him, a gentle look on his face. 

“I’m gonna head home now, good night,” said Woojin, and Changbin waved his hand a little, before the older went to get his jacket, and left the house. 

Changbin glanced around the living room, his gaze ending up on Jeongin, who was now sitting next to the sleeping Jisung, a soft glint in his eyes, as he ran his fingers through the older’s locks. Changbin walked towards them without any second thought, and crouched in front of them on the floor, his gaze going from Jisung to Jeongin. 

“You’re really special to him, you know?” whispered Changbin, and Jeongin let out a sigh. 

“He’s really special to me, too,” the younger confessed, his thumb brushing gently Jisung’s eyebrow. Changbin let out a light hum. 

“Are you gonna tell him?” he asked after a few seconds, to which the younger replied with a nod. 

“Soon.” 

≫≫

Changbin was back at his dorm now, his gaze stuck on the wall as he lay in his bad, not able to fall asleep again. There was a lonely plastic star glued to the ceiling, unmoving. Changbin felt like it was judging him. He kicked his leg up in the air, making Gyu fall off his bed onto the floor, but the star didn’t give any response. It was just a star, after all. 

Gyu was back in his dorm again. Changbin didn’t question how the munchlax always seemed to disappear, only to appear later in unexpected places. It wasn’t his place to tell the plushie what it was allowed to do. 

Changbin picked up his munchlax, laying it in front of himself, as he turned to lie on his stomach. Gyu’s empty plushie eyes were staring back at him, and he pouted without meaning to. 

“Do you think I should talk to Felix, Gyu?” whispered Changbin, holding the plushie closer to his face. His lip jutted out slightly. 

“I’m not being stupid, am I?” he asked again, sighing at the lack of a response. 

“I think I’m gonna do it, Gyu, I’m gonna tell him my feelings today,” he continued. 

“Wish me luck.” 

≫≫

Now, as he was standing in front of Felix’s door, he realized that he still wasn’t ready for this. All his senses told him to flight, though he already ringed the bell, so there was no going back now. 

The door opened a little bit, Felix’s sleepy face poking from behind it, and he smiled softly at the sight of Changbin, before taking a step back and opening the door wider. Changbin came in slowly, not sure how to act around the other after all that happened at Chan’s place. 

“Can’t sleep again?” murmured Felix, his voice heavy with sleep, and Changbin nodded without saying anything back, which made Felix smile just a little bit more, and the younger let out a breathy chuckle. 

“Come with me, then,” he whispered, taking Changbin’s hand in his and pulling him towards the bedroom. 

They ended up on Felix’s bed again, lying comfortably next to each other, their shoulders brushing just slightly. 

“Felix?” Changbin’s voice interrupted the silence that filled the room before. The boy hummed questioningly. Changbin sat up, looking at the younger, thinking if this was the right time to say this. But then, he already waited so long, he might as well do it now. 

He shuffled closer, putting his hands on the pillow on both sides of Felix’s head. The other just stared at him, silently, waiting for what he’d do next. The obvious trust in Felix’s eyes made Changbin’s heart melt. He stayed like that for a little bit, appreciating the way the boy’s hair fell messily on the pillow, how his freckles were barely visible in the darkness, how soft the boy’s lips looked. 

He slowly inched closer, hesitating just a breath away from the boy’s mouth, waiting for any signs of disapproval or maybe even disgust, but when he didn’t saw any, he pressed his lips to Felix’s own, lingering there for a few seconds, before pulling away slightly and looking him in the eyes. 

“I think I really, really like you,” he admitted. Felix smiled at him softly, his eyes crinkling up gently. 

“I think I really like you too,” he relpied, and pulled Changbin back in by the neck, kissing him, this time more confidently, even though the kisses stayed innocent the whole night, and Changbin felt Felix smile against his lips. 

≫≫

They woke up cuddling, both their phones filled with messages and calls from Jisung. When they checked what it was about, turns out that Jeongin finally confessed to him. The two video called him, and on the screen they saw not only Jisung, but Minho and Jeongin as well. They talked for some time, happy that all of them ended up together, Jisung screeching when Changbin told them how they’re also a couple now. 

“Double date!” screamed Jisung excitedly. 

“Maybe some other time,” murmured Minho with a soft smile, pulling the younger into his lap, Jeongin kissing away the pout from Jisung’s face. Felix and Changbin smiled at the cute sight. 

≫≫

Back in his own house, Chan was staring at the ceiling numbly, trying to squash down the feelings he had towards Woojin.

It didn't work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe it's finished now, what am I gonna do with my life now? (write some other fic, I guess)  
> But like, honestly, thank you all for all the kind comments about this work, they made me really happy, though I hope the ending doesn't leave you unsatisfied,,  
> Also, I might write some one-shots on how Minho and Jeongin got together with Jisung, since I didn't want to fully desribe it in this fic, because, hey, the main pairing is changlix here, right?


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